The Walking Dead Season 4: A Recap

The Walking Dead Season 4: A Recap

 

Figure 1. IT'S OVER AND I CANNOT HANDLE THIS

Figure 1. IT’S OVER AND I CANNOT HANDLE THIS

 

I have no ability to make paragraphs today, so you will have to accept a bullet-point list.

– This season was uneven and annoying on many levels.

– In addition to the Killer Flu, many characters appeared to be suffering from Too Stupid To Live Syndrome

– It’s not just the shipping disappointments I’m annoyed with. I ship Daryl with EVERYONE, pretty much, except Carl.

– It’s the pacing. The SLOOOOOOW SHOWCASE EPISODES. The long lingering shots of people staring at other people. Or staring off into space. It’s like television except written by Hemingway. “Staring. No words. What does this mean? Is Daryl thinking about fishing? Or his nameless impotent dick problems?”

– Maggie’s obsessed with finding Glenn (not her sister) and Tyrese is still dreaming about Karen (not his sister). WHAT THE HELL

– I don’t understand the whole Am I A Farmer Or A Killer? dilemma Rick has. You’re both. Jesus. Everyone has to be BOTH.

 

Figure 2. It's pretty simple, Rick. You plant things, you set snares, you kill people with your teeth. This is the New Normal.

Figure 2. It’s pretty simple, Rick. You plant things, you set snares, you kill people with your teeth. This is the New Normal.

 

– I didn’t appreciate the hard left into Sadistic Raping Assholery that Joe took. I thought maybe he’d be another muddy-morals character to add to the pile?

– The final episode did have me FULL OF TENSION. So, kudos. But the previous episodes? Not so much.

– I did get all tingly when Rick said, “You’re my brother” to Daryl. I wanted to grab my pom poms and jump up and down.

– I like Carl being a killer. I like Carl going after someone screaming for help. That makes him Rick’s son. And Lori’s son, too.

– Oh, Herschel. I miss you. I also miss Merle.

Figure 3. Fuck you, Terminus lunatics.

Figure 3. Fuck you, Terminus lunatics.

 

– I’m guessing Beth is in a whole other situation. Unless she’s already been eaten and crapped out by the Terminus psychos? But I don’t think snatching people out of nowhere is their thing.

– How the fuck can we expect Carol & Tyrese to save the day when they’ve got Judith? You can’t really shoot people with Dead Joe’s weapons cache while holding Judith. Oh my dear holy lord.

– I am glad Abraham is part of our group now. Abraham, Rick and Daryl alone would be unstoppable. But they’ve got Michonne and Glenn, too. It’s going to be an epic bloodbath.  Just as soon as they get out of that cattle car. Christ almighty.

– October is approximately four million years away.

 

2 Comments

  • Matthew MacNish on Mar 31, 2014 Reply

    Forgot to subscribe.

  • Matthew MacNish on Mar 31, 2014 Reply

    The Terminus people have to be cannibals, right? I mean there ain’t no “can’t” in “cannibal.” Plus they were quite obviously shooting to miss. I mean unless they’re saving the group for some sort of weird corpse art, they must have wanted the flesh undamaged for some reason.

    Otherwise, yeah. Basically agree with everything you said.

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