Questions for Guys

Questions for Guys

Figure 1: Adrian. He knows everything. Also, lookit him rock the Man Sweater!

Here’s a list of questions I’ve posed to Adrian in the past:

– How long can a guy have a boner before it goes away?

– How do you make Lucite?

– What do you call that collection of stuff you get in a test tube when you burn off some liquid? That leftover glob? What’s the word for that?

– Can two people fit in a deerstand? For how long, reasonably?

– What kind of car would a Marine Corps recruiter probably drive?

– Do you really need a tire iron to change a flat?

– So if a guy has a boner for a really long time, but no ejaculation, what then? Blue balls? How long do those last?

– How old are you in Boy Scouts when they teach you how to build a fire?

– Do you really care what a girl’s hair looks like?

– What kind of shotgun do you use to hunt deer?

– Do guys really help other guys get laid?

– When you buy a door at a hardware store, does it come with a doorknob? And does the doorknob come with its own key? Or do you get that from a locksmith or something?

– Do guys really notice what women smell like? Or that their skin is soft?

– Can a 17-year-old boy carry a window air conditioner unit by himself?

– Why do European men wear those gross motorcycling outfits?

– What is going through your head during a fist-fight? Are you capable of thoughts, even?

– Have you ever put a condom on under water? Is that even possible?

– Do guys walk around naked in the locker room?

– How many push-ups can the average man do at a time?


  • Scott Mesrobian on Jan 17, 2013 Reply

    A few thoughts…

    – Leftover glob in test tube: residue

    – Two people in a deer stand: It depends on the deer stand. (generally, no…otherwise it’s called a treehouse)

    – Needing a tire iron: Only if it has the wrench head to remove the lug nuts (otherwise you’d just use it to beat the shit out of someone).

    – Do men care what a girl’s hair looks like: No, unless it looks exceptionally weird or exceptionally nice (I know, try to figure out that logic)

    – You don’t hunt deer with a shotgun. You use a rifle (or bow & arrow)

    – Guys helping other guys get laid: Not in my experience (yes, I know that sounds pathetic).

    – The doorknob and lockset (w/ keys) are sold separately from the door, but you don’t go to a locksmith.

    – Men noticing what women smell like or the softness of their skin: This guy notices.

    – 17-yr-old boy carrying an air conditioner: Depends on the boy. And the air conditioner.

    – European men and motorcycling outfits: It’s usually protective gear, which minimizes the style quotient.

    – Nothing goes through a guy’s head during a fist-fight. Otherwise he wouldn’t be fighting. (I know that makes me sound gay. I’m not. But I’ve never been in a fist-fight. At least not that I remember. Of course, how could I remember if nothing was going through my head at the time?)

    – Condom under water: No. And I don’t know.

    – Push-ups: I can only do one at a time. But I can probably manage 50 consecutively without stopping. I don’t know if that makes me average or a weakling or superhuman.

  • Carrie on Jan 09, 2013 Reply

    I will get the mister started on this post-haste.

  • Elizabeth Fama on Jan 09, 2013 Reply

    Answers, please.

Leave Reply