Things That Baffle Me
– How to park a car and not scrape the front bumper against the little concrete hump thing in a parking lot.
– How to make a fried egg that doesn’t look like it was an assault victim.
– Why people find Monty Python funny.
– Why people laugh when someone wipes out on a banana peel or various other physical misfortunes caught on tape.
– The point of a top sheet.
– How to clip a dog’s claws without fainting or vomiting.
– Why anyone would want to work in a hospital, in any capacity, but especially an emergency room.
– Why people watch hospital dramas on television.
– How to hang a picture straight on a wall.
– Those cars with the huge collections of stuffed animals on the rear dash.
– How to cook meat or fish.
– People who discuss ‘the taste’ of whiskey or tequila in a sophisticated way.