Things I’m Not Going To Do Probably Ever

Things I’m Not Going To Do Probably Ever

1)  Work as a police officer, soldier, taxi driver, pizza delivery person – basically any occupation that involves driving or weaponry.

2)  Read The Help. Even if you tell me it was good. Even if you tell me you are black and used to be a maid in Mississippi in the 60’s and THAT’S THE WAY IT WAS. Even if you give me money. No. And I’m not seeing the movie, either.

3) Wear flats with pointy toes.

4)  Get season tickets to anything (sports, plays, orchestras, operas).

5)  Buy a trench coat.

6)  Cut my hair short.  Going to have long white hair in my coffin.

7)  Listen to The Arcade Fire. I know I should. I just don’t want to. This would involve a long, hard sell. And someone tipping me off to some gateway song that I won’t be able to resist.

8)  Learn to pilot any sort of aircraft.

9)  Visit Asia.

10)  Take up Sudoku (math, eww).


  • Carrie on Sep 02, 2011 Reply

    Sid and Jeff will try their hardest on the Arcade Fire thing.

    But The Help? No. I object to it being a vehicle told from a white POV so that white people can feel like they solved racism.

  • Holly on Sep 02, 2011 Reply

    I may have to have Brian take up the Arcade Fire thing with you…not that I really like them either though, but he is a big fan. I actually just finished reading The Help though–no interest in the movie though. It was good, don’t feel a need to foist it on anyone though.

  • megan on Sep 01, 2011 Reply

    you would have to tie me down to get me to listen to arcade fire.

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