Harry Potter and The Deathly Hallows, Part II: It All Ends Here
I don’t know what to say, because it’s over and I’m not sad. I’m not complaining, either. Because it’s over. It’s been over for awhile, since Book 7 came out. I really felt sad after I finished reading Book 7. But the last movie – I don’t know. I’m doing okay.
Also, the HP movies are the only book-to-film adaptations that I accept without much complaint. They seem to honor the spirit of the books very well, by which I mean that although they aren’t exact adaptations, they always give me the same feeling I get when I read the books. Which isn’t something to dismiss away. So, if the films cut a subplot or gloss over a scene here and there, I get it and don’t care very much. We can’t have 17+ hour movies. I mean, I need to go to the bathroom in my own toilet, m’kay. Plus: Books And Movies – They Are Different. Of course, the books are richer and more satisfying – because they involve you doing more imaginative work. Hello. Anyway.
First, let me discuss the previews.
Cowboys & Aliens? A concept developed by screenwriting software. Though points for Daniel Craig.
War Horse? Pure cornography. Once I heard that sweeping orchestra score, I was heaving.
Arthur Christmas? Adrian will have to fall on this sword.
Abduction? Am ashamed to say this looks somewhat good. Give that poor Twilight bastard something fun to do besides wait for his demon vampire baby bride to hit puberty.
The Dark Knight Rises? Hell to the Yes.
Sherlock Holmes: Game of Shadows: No. Too many slo-mo bullets. Also, Jude Law grosses me out. He looks, in the words of Sid my nephew, like he’d feel sticky if you touched him.
Okay, so here are few random thoughts on DH Pt. II:
Opening. I was glad to see they kicked things off with the same ominous feeling we had at the end of Pt. I, with revisiting the tomb plundering scene, and then seeing the Dementors and Snape the new headmaster overseeing Hogwarts.
DUR. Am I stupid for forgetting what that mirror shard is? Someone remind me what that thang is
The Gringotts Break-In. I liked this. It wasn’t too long, but it definitely got things rolling in an exciting way. It was like they used the Temple of Doom mineshaft rollercoaster. Also, the dragon was gross. And cool.
Whoa, Shirtless Pale English Boys! I like that Ron’s sorta paunchy. I find ripped abs a little ridiculous. You know people who have ripped abs are somewhat insane given that they cannot eat 99% of all delicious foods on this earth. And I like Harry’s belly hair. I know people think that’s gross. But I’m immune to hairiness as icky, given my choice in husband.
The Kiss In The Chamber of Secrets. I didn’t have a problem with Ron and Hermione’s kiss like some people did. I thought it was cute that they giggled. I can’t recall their kissing in the book being so momentous, of course. *must go back and read like a dork*
Don’t Take Notes In The Dark. For some reason, in my notes I took during the film, I wrote several times “Wand = Penis.” Your guess is as good as mine.
Obligatory YOU GUYS! Neville-Is-So-HOT! Remarks. So, Neville. HUBBA HUBBA. And that’s not a Cosby sweater, you idiots! It’s a Fair Isle and just shut up! And yeah, I know he doesn’t marry Luna, and that her sitting down beside him at the end (in her weird playclothes that look like something my mother sewed for me to wear in the 70’s) was a big piece of raw meat for the Neville/Luna shippers, but who cares. They are friends. They were in the DA. They both have weird names. Get it over it. (NEVILLE! CALL ME!)
The Room of Requirement. I LOVED the Fiendfyre scene in the Room of Requirement. It was better than the Gringotts Break-In. I wish I could bust out some Fiendfyre on my basement. Because it got water in it a few days ago and everything in it besides the washer and dryer is just so much crap I don’t…require. Ha ha.
McGonagall F*&K YEAH. She’s just so wonderful. The rad grandma we all wish we had. Also, adored the spells montage as everyone readied to protect Hogwarts.
OH SNAPE SIGH. Snape’s death and memories were beautiful. Alan Rickman is a treasure. The power of love, blah blah blah, snivel, sob. Very well done.